lessons from a child...

So the other day I was sitting in my suit mate, Anisha's room, and we were discussing notes for A/G History and Polity. So we got about half way into them and then went off on this huge, 3 hour long Jesus rant! It was so awesome! We were diffinatly iron sharping iron. I loved it. But ok...to the point about the child....
Anisha was telliing me about this girl at her church back home, and this little girl looked up to her so much and wanted to be just like her that she even started to try to sneeze like Anisha. I guess she sneezes weird or somethin. I thought that was just the cutest thing, and I even remembered when I tried to do things exactly like the person that I had looked up to so many years ago.

But then I thought... what if we did that with Jesus? What if we truely tried to be just like Him? what would that even look like? I mean, in the Bible it tells us to "be holy for He is holy."

Holiness: it's nothing less than conforming to Jesus.

God is definately dealing with me on this issue. Every time I turn around someone is mentioning holiness in a sermon or in the classroom! I'm so baffled by it. Holiness. What a thought! Striving to be just like God, in every day situations. Wow.

I think sometimes people hear the word "holiness" and they know that it could be attainable, only if you're a pastor, or some amazingly spiritual missionary or something.
Holiness if for everyone! God created us to be holy! I just keep thinking.... what would that even look like if we went all out, and with every fiber of our being, strived to be holy? Oh how awesome!

So I encourage all of you to strive to be holy, in thought, action, and even the words you speak. Let God mold you into His likeness. Be willing for Him to mold you.

ok it's cheezy, but still, i like it!

ok so just go with me here:
i was passing a church on the waoy to ash grove to see my mom and the name of the church was evergreen bapstist, which got me thinking.... i want to be like the evergreen....
ever like Jesus
ever loving
ever compassionate
ever forgiving

etc.....
we should always be striving to be like Him, in everything that we do. standing tall just like.... an evergreen!

:)

summer.

so i really feel like i am doing nothing of value this summer. its driving me crazy that i am not somewhere doing something!!! i want to be overseas or at least out of state, even another city would be fine. i cant stand it anymore in springfield!!!! im going nuts! I dont like the thought of my bf out there living it up and i am stuck here! i want to work with my youth group and do ministry in my home church, yano poor back into the church that has poured quite a bit into me. i know this summer isnt useless, i know God has a plan. im just not sure what it is and its frusterating. sometimes it feels as though there wont be a "plan" for me to follow this summer. its gone by so fast, i dont want to waste it, i want to use it to get closer to God. i am going to youth camp in 2 weeks as an assistant dorm leader with my church i know God will do mighty things. i know ministry cant happen over night, it involves time to make strong relationships, establish trust, and so forth. ugh. i look to God he is my source of strength. its just frusterating sometimes.

situations shape who you are.

what has college done to me? is that really the question or is it what have i allowed college to do to me? im thinking its prolly the later. man, this has been a super rough year. i dont want to quit, but sometimes when i let my mind free to wander i can't help but think about this and be tempted. i don't think i would ever leave, i dont think i could.

but now after looking back on this year, i can't help but wonder who i am. when i came here i was so stinkin sure of who i was. i knew who i was in Christ. i still know i am a child of the king, but what i dont know, is who is that child of the king? im trying so hard to find myself in God. i guess you just have to go to source to find that out. i just need to get away for a weekend or something. i just need to get away from people here and just think and draw close to God. i miss those youth camp days b/c there was no one to bother you and God. it was so peaceful. im going to have to find the youth camp life again.

Azuza Street Revival!

So I'm sitting back stage waiting for my first scene in the Azuza play. I can't help but think of the past two performences we've had. God has fallen in such a mighty way! I've heard such awesome stories of how people have been touched. Man, this is what its all about! Like Sis Mo said, even if it's one person that gets touched its all worth it! Man, so far during some of the scenes it's like I get a glimpse of the Azuza Revial. It's so intense! I'm just praying that the cast and crew of this play, never get tired of this. i mean, even though its the same lines and same exact thing everytime, somehow it NEVER gets old! God's spirit falls! whew! its powerful stuff.

The God "Experience"

I'm sitting here getting ready to go to bed and just had this thought and had to write about it before i forgot about it.
I've noticed that sometimes people, (myself included) tend to seek the "experience" of God, and not God himself. We just want to "feel" God and then we're happy until we come back when our cup is empty. Instead of living like this, I want to daily have my cup refilled! It's kinda like when you go to a resturant and the guy constantly fills your glass even when you've only taken 4 sips out of it. Or what about when people come by and fill your mug with more coffee, making the coffee warmer than what it was previously. Well it's like that with God. I want to have God pour a fresh anointing, and a fresh since of His presence in my life, everyday. How can we stand to live on yesterday's cold coffee? God wants to refresh us, but we settle for less when God has more to give. The Bible says to recieve the fullness of God. sometimes we are content with part of it. I know I want to live everyday with a fresh anointing. I want that refilling in my coffee cup! I don't want just an experience, I want God! (I don't mean to talk down upon the awesome experiences we do have with God. Thats not what I'm trying to say at all) I want to see God's face. I want to know every little thing about Him and His personality. Everyday is a new adventure with my father, and I cherish every minute of it!

Who am I?

Seriously? Who am I to go to a place, by myself, where Christians are persecuted. The country is number 6 on the the top ten most persecuted countries in the world! Who am I to go there when I can't even witness in my home town? I feel like the biggest hypocrite. I am not ready for this. How can I preach when I don't even know how? I'm think... kinda considering, about a decision that is prolly gonna ruin my future. You can take it as running from my calling, while persuing it at the sametime. ugh. This is rediculous.

But God is so awesome. He has put all of this together in his perfect timing. He was workin even when I didn't see Him. I'm going forth, not looking back! I'm plunging into this missions thing! I hear God calling, and now...ready or not, here I go!